|So now I'm going to approach the topic
of my move. I am excited and scared and sad all at the same time.
Excited because I'm going to get my degree! Yay! It will take a little over a year, but it will be done with (for now - until I get a Bachelor's in Writing at another university) and I will be skilled in something that I'm not skilled in right now and that's just sounding fabulous. I will be living in Orlando, which I guess is fun for a lot of people. My mom says it's her favorite place on earth. Okay, well if mom likes it I'm sure I can find at least something nice about it. Jay told me it's like Texas, but with palm trees. Which to me, sounds like Houston. And I don't like Houston. But Houston doesn't house Disney World or Nickelodeon studios or anything good like that.
Scared because I won't know anyone there except for Jay and Caroline, and she'll be gone after just a short while. I'm scared of Floridians. I have a fear that every boy I meet is going to look like a member of the Backstreet Boys or N Sync and the girls are going to either look like Carmen Electra or Gloria Estefan. I am not blonde or tan either. I haven't had a proper tan since probably ... 1991. The summer I sat outside everyday reading Beatles biographies. And though I was born near the beach, I don't really remember ever living close to the water. And Erin reminded me of something fun Florida has for a few months each and every year -- HURRICANE SEASON! Hip hip fucking hooray. I am from the plains of North Texas where we might have a handful of tornado warnings a year, but I've seen actual footage of like houses mangled with palm trees from those Floridian hurricanes. And that's scary.
Sad because I won't have a chance to see my family that often. Sad that I'm missing out on seeing my three year old sister grow up. That I won't be able to call up Amanda and say "let's go to Denny's" or go to see one of our friends play at a club. I won't be able to confer with Erin over dinner. I won't be able to see Katie to catch up on what we are always meaning to tell one another. No seeing Glen act like he's trying to out-Chris Murphy Chris Murphy when he's onstage. (Yes, he's that bad.) No Corn Mo! No more discussions about VanDamme movies and Who cover songs with my beloved Corn Mo. No more getting threatened by the Cobras. No more dancing to Small Faces songs with T.J. No more annoyances in the office by my coworkers (primarily one person, but still). No more going out to lunch with Tammy and confiding everything in her.
And none of these things may seem terribly important to other people, but I really do take advantage of the fact that I know a lot of remarkable people. And I'll miss them more than I can say.
But life goes on. I can look at it in many different ways. I can come back here when the year is over and still have my friends and things will be jolly, I'll just be making more money. Or I'll go to school and get my degree and find a job elsewhere that is just so wonderful, I won't be able to turn it down. Or I'll get killed in a hurricane and they'll find my cadaver sandwiched between Rob Thomas and little Aaron Carter (both from Orlando!).
My predicaments are as follows:
School will start soon too, so that will be extra good. I just basically have to figure out the best way to get out of Dallas and to Orlando, get a job, start making money, and then I'll feel much better. Until then, I'm the resident fraidy cat. I embrace change but I've got the last minute jitters.
Aside from that pretty much occupying my mind as of late, I'm enjoying myself. Last night I went with Amanda to August Moon, a Chinese restaurant here in Plano which is really good. Amanda found a Wings Over America t-shirt at a thrift store for 25 cents and it's just about the finest thing I've ever seen. I plan on going back there this weekend because she told me about a Motley Crue shirt she found for the same price and it sounds like it would be ultra-fine. Tonight we are either going to Denton for a night of ultra-pretention with Legendary Crystal Chandelier and Lift to Experience or I'm going to use my free coupon for two people at Club Clearview to see Fastball. Yes, Fastball. If it's free, it will at least be fun to sit back and laugh at, though I can already tell that the crowd is going to be a bit on the frat side. Or I can just stay at home, which at this point sounds like a very good option. This cold I have is kicking my ass.
My modfather Steve Nutt told me about this vitamin C at Whole Foods which is like 1600% times the FDA standards and it won't destroy me with toxins because it's water soluble. I'm going tonight to pick up some, because I just can't get rid of this cough and congestion. And I've had it for a few months now off and on. It's miserable. I used to never get sick, and for the past year I guess my body isn't as immune as it used to be. I should really go to a doctor, I guess. But with my other expenses, I really don't think I can afford to foot the bill to be told that I need to take more vitamins and get more rest. I know that on my own. So I'll save the money and go get those ultra-bionic vitamin C's that The Nutt told me to get. He knows best. After all, he saw Quadrophenia at it's first screening. And I will abide by any rule set forth by someone who can put that on their resume.
I updated my photo album yesterday with some pictures that Jay took while he was visiting a couple of weeks ago. The first two are in my apartment (if you look really hard you can see my little Navy Blues promo poster) before we went out on a Thursday night. We went to Club Clearview to see Weener but got the date wrong, and for the three of us, it cost $25 to get in. The band we saw was complete mock-Korn-type-hardcore (yes, they were even still in high school!) and it was terrible. KDGE were giving away free stuff and I somehow ended up with an Eve 6 CD. So I figured that damn album cost me $25. Just tie me to the lampost. The third one in the set is from the Go Metric show at the Rubber Gloves. The Emo bands on the bill weren't doing much for my mood (which was already bad) and I went out to Amanda's car and found her Manics shirt in the trunk. I went back in and sat with a couple of MMs and NMEs with Manics cover stories and tried my best to look the part. It at least amused me for a few minutes and helped me keep my mind off of the fact that I was having to listen to crap. Amanda told me to send that picture to a Manics BBS and see how many boys write me confessing their love and threatening suicide if they don't get a reply. It's tempting.
So let me continue my day and try not to cough myself to death. It's payday! Which means pay my bills day! Oh joy. It just doesn't get any better than this.