Saw Your Old Lady in a Porno Mag

It's been a very long time since I've had time to update my page, but it's been for good reason. I've really not been in one place long enough to even consider coding or writing, so bear with me while I try to bring you all up to date on the life of Chrissy.

First of all, two Wednesdays ago, I got a call telling me that a lady that worked in another department was being transferred ... to my position. And that I had until the end of the week. Why? Because I was a temporary employee that had been working for them for 9 months, continually being told that I would be hired on, and it was delayed because of layoffs at the Ericsson offices all over the globe. And for the past couple of months especially, my coworker and I have been butting heads. She was under the impression that I was her unofficial page, though according to my boss and the org chart, she was on the same level as me. So that created tension in the office, needless to say. After being told about the "reorg" Deb (the coworker) came up to my desk telling me that the lady taking my place was an old friend of hers and she was a great person, and although I was good at my position, I was more "technical" and that I wasn't "smart enough to be a secretary and that maybe you should look for a more suitable position in IT because that seemed to be what you are best at. You know, it's not every person that can file things accordingly, you're just better at that more computer-y side of things. No offense to you, you're just not smart enough to be in administration." Smart enough to be in administration!? That has to be the best compliment I've received in a while.

So I'm looking for an IT job.

Anyways, the next day Amanda and I hopped on Air-Tran and went to Atlanta for Music Midtown, which is a three-day festival that the city hosts every year. Trinket were playing and had set us up with some complimentary tickets, so hey, why not? I had to get out of town to sort through all of the choices I had to make pretty quickly ... and that could be interpreted as a wise or stupid decision, I don't care. I just knew that I had to get a change of scenery or I'd end up in a closet with a noose around my neck. Or thrown in jail for murdering Deb. Maybe not that drastic, but you know, I do like my drama.

Our flight was delayed because of bad weather in Atlanta, so we finally got into Hartsfield around midnight. We got overcharged for a taxi to the hotel and were dying of hunger so thought it would be a good idea to walk a block to the closest Waffle House at 2:30 am. Baaaaaaad idea. I am surprised that we weren't gang banged or shot because of the clientele sitting around staring at the two of us who were terribly misplaced. It was comforting to see in the jukebox a Rosa Parks speech right next to the full Kirk Franklin album. Not your average Waffle House.

The next day we got up and surprise! It was 50 degrees! And the two of us had packed only short sleeved shirts and I had only brought open toed sandals. Stupid! So we got on MARTA and took it to Little Five Points (where a lot of the cool shops and clubs are) and found coats for $5 at a second hand store. And they were nice too! I got a bright blue parachute material coat and she got yet another Damon Albarn jacket for her collection. I found a pair of fly blue and yellow old school tennis shoes at Junkman's Daughter in the clearance section, and after lunch at the Vortex (where we were sitting next to members of Virgo's Merlot) we head to the festival site. After walking around the entire perimeter looking for the will call booth, we finally got our tickets and waited at the gate next to a bunch of teenagers waiting to see some hardcore band. What intelligent conversations they had! It was hell. They were late opening the gates by 40 minutes, and when we heard Trinket actually start before any fans were inside, we started a riot at the gate yelling that we didn't come from Dallas to stare at the security guards and our friends were playing a set and this was bullshit. So finally, enough kids revolted, they took our tickets, and off we ran to the 96 Rock stage, past Willie Nelson's TWO tourbuses all decked out in Texas flags and cow skulls. Got to meet Caroline finally, and a few other Trinket fans who were standing nearby. Walked with Jay, Caroline, her brother, and Tommy across the site to the 99x Stage to see Kent and met up with Marcus, who Amanda and I just adore to pieces.

We moved up closer to the stage and ended up standing in front of two of the Tender Idols who were being thwarted with stupid questions by a couple of girls that "could tell they were in a band from how they were dressed". They also thought Amanda and I were in a band (I guess it pays to not wear knit and to actually apply make-up!) and I said, yes, The Plungers, and Marcus told them he used to roadie for us years ago. When I told them that we were inspired by the likes of the Move and John's Children, they got really confused and walked off. And Danny from the Tender Idols just laughed. Kent played a beautiful set and I fell in mini-love with Sami who was one of the sexiest guitarists I've ever seen. Half Nick Rhodes, half Peter Holmstrom, 100% Swedish love. Ahh. Sami.

We ran into Ian, the lead singer for the Tender Idols on our way to find the Wherehouse Tent and talked to him for a few minutes. Amanda was smitten. So cute.

Finally got to the well-hidden Wherehouse Tent where Kent were to be signing autographs and I got a copy of Isola signed for Angie for her 17th birthday. We had our pictures taken with them, none of which turned out, but Sami stood by me and gave me lots of lovely Swedish hugs and cute pouty flirty faces and for that, I will always love him. We made our way back to the 99x stage to see the Black Crowes, who saved the day by replacing the Goo Goo Dolls who had to cancel because they got sick. Poor little Johnny. I hope he and his Modern Rock cold got better quickly. Kent came out from backstage and found us and stood with us throughout most of the Black Crowes set and we were in heaven. Chris Robinson is so cool too. At one point, he yelled "You with the laser pointer. Shove it up your ass you pencil dicked motherfucker!" and we all cheered. The city was lit up behind us, the moon was full, the crowd was crazy, and we all felt so happy.

After that, we were supposed to meet Marcus at the Tabernacle, a club down the street that used to be the House of Blues. We sat through a couple of modern rock hell bands and decided we were too tired to stay any longer. Got a cab back to the hotel and crashed until the next morning.

Woke up, watched Ghostbusters II and left the hotel to find our new hotel downtown at the Super 8. A block away from the Tabernacle and about three blocks from the festival. Perfect. Had lunch at Hard Rock Cafe where our Transvestite waiter/waitress was rude, and then made our way down the street to Music Midtown. We got there a bit early for the Rick Springfield set, so we walked around and made sure we left the 99x stage before Kid Rock played. I have never seen so many upset kids in my life. Or frat boys with no shirts on. Scary. The Rick crowd was MUCH better. Told some guy in a Bun E. Carlos Experience t-shirt that it was cool, and he looked like he was about to explode with excitement that not only had someone had recognized the high importance of his apparel, but it was a young girl. We stood by two geeky indie kids who made jokes about "Hot For Teacher" and saw a couple of Rick's songs before we hightailed it BACK to the 99x stage where Marvelous 3 were going to play. We were stuck behind some really obnoxious drunken sorority girls for a while, until they asked us if we wanted to get in front of them, so we made a beeline through the Bud Lite drinkers and ended up standing right in front of Jayce, next to his mother and sisters and brother in law. It was so fun! They were so sweet and kind to us because we were from Texas and pointed out Jayce's cute son to us up on the stage. Marvelous 3 were SOOOOO good live too! It was honestly my favorite set I saw all weekend. My little crush on Butch Walker increased and I was walking googly-eyed around in the sunshine, avoiding beer cans, all the way back to the Wherehouse tent for the Marv3 signing. Rick Springfield was slated to do his signing at the same time and there were a couple hundred rabid post-menopause women waiting to get a piece of action. And the Marv3 line was full of screaming pre-teens that would lose it anytime they caught a glimpse of the band. I saw one girl run and fall on the ground a handful of times while just standing there. Met the band, they were sweethearts and giggled while walking off. We had nothing to do for a while, so we got back in line and had our pictures taken with them. I was wearing a skirt and didn't know how to get to the other side of the table, so I just scaled it and kissed Butch on the cheek and pissed off some girls behind us in line. We left them with the line, "we hope your prices are as cheap as ours are" and scampered off to the 99x Local Stage to see the Tender Idols. Met up with Tommy and crew and found out a day later that we missed our chance to say "hi" to Della again! Oh no! Della! I can't wait for another opportunity to see that sweetheart again. The last time we were in Rome, GA, we exchanged a few words, and I didn't want to cause a scene, but you better believe the next time I see her, her little eyebrow ring won't be in place much longer.

After the Tender Idols, we ran across the field and somehow made it to the front row for Iggy Pop's set. All while wearing skirts and carrying handbags. Iggy's backing band looked and sounded like Petra and we were stalked by a fat albino man. And were stuck next to a guy in a wheelchair who was moshing in his own little way in the front row. It was kind of scary.

Afterwards, we went to the Tabernacle, found Jay, Caroline, Tommy and Marcus, and watched the Smithereens. I went down to get a water at the bar and some old guy asked me what I was having. I said water because I was broke and he replied with "Baby, I can give you anything on the ends of the earth that you could ever want." To which I replied with, "In that case, can I please have a White Russian?" and then I ran off and hid with my friends in the balcony. I went back to the hotel after that and found Amanda tanked on Skyy watching an infomercial on how to dry potatoes and roses. We went to sleep shortly thereafter.

Sunday morning we got up and saw B*Witched at the Fox Kids stage. The blonde one had hurt her knee the day before so the other three did all of the dancing. And my god, those girls are annoying. Amanda had all we could take after about 6 songs in 15 minutes and decided to walk back to the 96 rock stage to wait for Buckcherry. I ran into Yogi first and he totally remembered our names and everything and they were all genuinely surprised to see us again. It was SO good to see them again after three months and to actually know all of the songs they did. They did throw a new one in there, "Fastback", which just totally did it for me. Josh brought his little 4 year old daughter out on his shoulders for the last song. We talked to them for a couple of minutes afterwards and then hung out with Tommy and Lynda the rest of the afternoon. Got some pizza downtown, went back to our hotel, ran into about half the population of Atlanta, and they all knew Tommy. I told him he was "that guy of this town". Every town has a "that guy" and it's good to know that I'm friends with at least a couple of them.

We decided to skip Hole that night and instead showered and got ready for the Buckcherry show at the Tabernacle. Tommy and Lynda came back when they had enough of Courtney Love's wacky antics, and we all went and enjoyed the show. Met the photographer Deb again and tried to stay away from a drunk couple who were analyzing our names. Big fun. Found out from  Tommy that Della had made it backstage and met Iggy Pop the day before and offered him some Xanax. Makes me feel kind of relieved that I'm not as stupid as some people are.

The next day we were supposed to fly back to Dallas, but stuck around Atlanta instead looking at Employment Guides and talking over the prospect of moving. Our deciding factor was when we were in Hard Rock Cafe and "Sweet Child O' Mine" came on and we almost lost it. So that's it. I have to move to Atlanta now. I really love it there and I think it's a good change.

We spent the night with her Dad south of the city and he treated us to a feast at Golden Corral. Her stepbrother enchanted us with his wit and enunciation (think rural Georgian accent) and the next day we went back to the airport to fly home. We got on the plane around 1:30 pm and I fell asleep. I woke up to the news that we were being rerouted to Houston because of the inclimate weather in Dallas (post tornado fun). So we sat on the runway for a couple of hours at Houston Hobby before we were told that our hydraulic system had failed so we were waiting for it to be fixed before we could even taxi back to the gate. We got off and they told us to wait for a plane to take us home. Then they came back and said never mind, you can fly southwest or take airtran back to Atlanta and fly back to Dallas on the next flight from there. And because we flew on a special deal, they couldn't do anything for us. So we were stuck in Houston. Got a hotel around 10 pm and basked in the glory of the room decor made up of black onyx and airbrushed vases. mmmm! The next morning I watched quite possibly the coolest movie in the world. I'm not sure what it was, but it was on HBO or Showtime and was about a kickboxing academy and their plight against the "bad" kickboxing school on the other side of town. How I wish I knew what it was called.

We got home that afternoon and ran some errands. The next morning we got up, did laundry, got in Amanda's Intrepid and drove back down to Houston for the Buckcherry show there that night. Found Instant Karma, and discovered that the venue had changed to Billy Blues for a private radio party. argh. Found Devon who made sure we were on the list, and then used the remaining free 45 minutes to find a hotel and get ready. The show was good, we made some friends (hi Lisa!) and we hung out with Keith, Josh, and Devon for quite a while after the show. Met their new roadie, Crispy, who is a bit on the unbathed side but quite an improvement from Jeff who they had on the last tour. Their new manager is also really nice and is friends with John Taylor, Duff, and that whole LA scene. Ahh. Can we say "hookup"?

Next morning we drove back to Dallas and were stuck in Houston traffic for two hours. Made it home in time to run to the mall and then get ready for the show. Got to the show and made our way to the private pizza party upstairs at Trees. Yay. More free stuff, more elitism. I love it.

Show was overcrowded (sold out!) and I had my head kicked in one too many times from people crowd surfing. I threatened one boy who fell on the floor next to me that if I saw his face again, I would rip his testicles off. I didn't see him again.

During the set, Keith hit himself in the nose with the neck of his guitar and had blood dripping all over the stage. He got rushed to Parkland Hospital right when they got offstage and I pray he's okay. Josh was the biggest sweetie after the show. Crispy confessed his undying love for Amanda for a couple of hours and we set JB up with  a Britney Spears lookalike.

Next morning drove to Tulsa in my dilapidated van. Butch had emailed me earlier in the week and I had asked him if he could relay any info about tickets to the edgefest up in Tulsa where they'd be playing, but I couldnt' find any information on how to buy tickets online, so could he hook us up? And we weren't given complimentary tickets. No! We were given all access laminates! Butch Walker thank you so much. Amanda and I sat in the hospitatlity tent for a good part of the afternoon drinking all of the free cokes we could get our hands on and stared down all the granola girls that were giving us dirty looks. Marvelous 3 finally went on and we got to stand on the side of the stage which was very fun. I had the best day. We talked to them for a while afterwards and I gave Butch a massage after he talked to an upset Collective Soul. They were 4 songs into their set before someone pelted the lead singer in the head with an empty bottle and they stopped in the middle of the song and said it was over. Some local band went onstage after them to appease the crowd and Butch and I stood behind  the stage and watched as I heard the COOLEST version of Free Bird to ever exist. Instead of using a guitar, they used a theremin for the guitar solo. Man. It was so good. Said our goodbyes and headed back to our schnazzy room at the Executive Inn, complete with missing fabric on the bedspread and the telephone permenantely mounted on the wall. Class. Elegance. Executive Inn. Remind me to never set foot in Tulsa again if I don't have to.

We made it home safely and have been loafing around ever since. I got a flat tire on Monday, probably from driving on McKinney Avenue which is all cobblestone and trolley tracks. Damn Dallas!

Right now i'm in the car on my way to Oklahoma City for the Buckcherry show tonight. The drive has been so nice. Amanda made me look up at one point to see two cows humping on the side of the road. I could kill her for that one. We just passed the wreckage leftover from the Tornado last week. My God. It is really bad! It was neat though because although EVERYTHING else on the east side of I-20 was destroyed, the big church in the middle of all of it was left standing with no scratches. It gave me chills.

My laptop is about to kapootz so I'll post this when we get to our hotel. Will have dinner tonight with my friend the Alex James lookalike and then see Buckcherry for the 8th time in three months. Sweet.